Excerpts from the Diary of a Diva

Excitement is too weak to describe what I'm feeling right now. It's Friday, and I have an apartment to call my own. I don't move in until the 15th, but there is now a space in this city that I can call my very own. And to let you know how good God REALLY is, it's a one-bedroom apartment in a private house, the rent is well within the budget, and it's in a good location. In addition, the lady who told me about the place lives next door -- which means I'll have a really sweet neighbor. What REALLY makes me happy is that I'll be able to spend comfortable time with New Boo. In private. With no one else around. When he comes over, he won't have to speak to anyone but me. And that thrills me more than I can articulate. Oh, and we worked through that situation. I think we'll be stronger than ever now. It's almost like we're unstoppable now.

What does true love look like? It looks like your man sleeping on the floor of your rented room because he's been in your craptastic bed all night & he needs to stretch out because he just can't take it anymore. But he's there because he wants to be with you that badly.  How could you possibly screw that up? By being the stupidest woman in the world.  I should've known better, but I never thought the dude I gave my number to on a whim -- after I made it clear that I had a man that I loved with all my heart -- would try to make a power play and call me at midnight on a Saturday night. But he did, and then I had to answer questions about a situation that doesn't exist and explain the unexplainable to someone who's been hurt by people who were supposed to love him. I'm so upset I don't know what to do. The LAST thing I ever want to do is hurt my baby. And that's what I've done. Now he's doubting me and all I stand for. And I can...

I have bad credit. I'm not saying this because I'm proud of it. I'm saying it because it's true. When I was in college, I got a bunch of credit cards with no way to pay the bills. Then as an adult, I went through periods of being both underemployed and unemployed. When I got jobs, I had to focus on the basics of food and shelter -- not catching up bills. And now I have a credit score that is in the toilet. Again...not a thing I'm proud of at all. But I mention this because I think it's ridiculous for apartment companies to judge me on my credit score. Here's why -- if I'm not able to pay a single bill, I make sure to keep a roof over my head. That means that I pay rent. If I'm RENTING from you, what does it matter what I do for everyone else? When random people look at my credit score, it doesn't show that the bills were paid perfectly and on-time until the job decided to lay you off. I just needed to get that off my chest. Carry on...

No matter how perfect a relationship starts, there will be bumps in the road. The test of what you really have is how you take them. Right now, I'm not taking this bump particularly well. Here's the deal. I'm living with the craziest roommate in the world. This chick keeps freakin' tools in the freezer. Don't believe me? I wouldn't believe me, either, but I have proof. New Boo lives a block away from one of the nicest areas I've seen in Brooklyn. And his whole block isn't bad. But the half of the block where he lives is horrid, and his building is the worst of them all. And that's in addition to it being a fourth-floor walkup and him having a roommate. Needless to say, neither one of us likes our living situation. And because we don't live alone, the thought of us being together while either one of our roommates is home just isn't pleasant. And I get that. But today was the first time ever that we were off at the same time, and I wa...

Today is another crappy day. If it's darkest before the dawn, then I'm due for a bright tomorrow. Anyway, I was really bugging out, and I reached out to New Boo. He could tell that all was not well in my world, and he asked me about it. When I told him that I was on the verge of screaming, he immediately went into Cheer Me Up mode. He said he wanted to see me later, and while I agreed, I told him straight out that I probably wouldn't be good company. You know what he said? "Good or bad company -- it doesn't matter. I just want you by my side." I honestly almost broke down right there. For one, no one's ever said that to me. Ever. And for him to say it almost makes this thing bearable. And here's where the comparison comes in. That Other Guy (can't really call him The One anymore) was always in such dire straits that there wasn't room for me to be anything other than his cheerleader. Also, he didn't know how to encourage me on any leve...

I'm not a crybaby. Things aren't perfect, but that's no reason to cry about them...at least not all the time. Right now, though, I'm feeling very weepy. I've been sick this week. I've been battling strep throat for the past two weeks, and it's hanging on like a champ. People who know me know that I'm not one to be sick, so this is REALLY taking a toll on me. And to add insult to injury, it's not just in my throat anymore. I found out that another manifestation of the strep bacteria causes your skin to peel. Hence the reason my hands look like I'm some kind of leper. Which wouldn't bother me, but I'm a people person...and someone who deals with the public. Can you IMAGINE how embarrassing this is? And on another note, I found out that a good friend of mine has been spilling secrets on me. How did I find that out? Well, New Boo's roommate and this friend are close -- MUCH closer than I thought. Close to the point that the things I...

Usually when people say, "I have my reasons," they're usually things they don't want to reveal. I've said that many times to many people. Today, though, I want to reveal a few of the reasons why I think New Boo is the bee's knees. 1. He's nice to me. I know that sounds like a given, but The One showed me that it's not always a given that the person you love will be nice to you. He definitely wasn't. But this guy is so sweet to me that he carries my bag when he could just insist that I do it. He also keeps me safe on the streets and he lets me be exactly who I am when we're together. I swear I love that. 2. He takes me nice places. Let me clarify something here. We're dating, but on a budget. Yet, we've seen some of the nicest places in the city. We actually act like tourists the way we explore. Today's trek took us to downtown Brooklyn. I think he got just as much of a kick out of looking at the great old apartments and architec...