Skip to main content

The End of an Era

You know, I'm not one of those people who gets bugged out by celebrities. After all, I've worked in the entertainment industry most of my adult life. Even though I haven't everyone I'd like to yet, I've been fortunate enough to meet some of the ones who've gone on before -- Luther Vandross, Gerald Levert, Aaliyah, to name a few. Unfortunately for me, that list does not include Michael Jackson. And now, thanks to his untimely death at the tender age of 50, I never will.

I am so hurt by Michael's death, and I couldn't figure out why. Then I started reminiscing about my first encounters with his music...

Because my mother wasn't a fan of the Jackson 5 -- don't ask me why -- their music wasn't in my house. Marvin Gaye, yes. Curtis Mayfield, yes. The O'Jays, The Spinners, Gladys Knight & The Pips? Yes, yes, yes. We even had Natalie Cole and The Emotions. But no Jackson 5. When I was in the third grade, my teacher, Mrs. Heldt, would let us listen to music if we finished our work early. And that, my friend, is where I discovered the amazing voice of Michael Jackson. Although I liked ABC, my favorite was The Love You Save. I worked like a Trojan everyday just so I could put on a pair of headphones and listen to this little boy who couldn't have been too much older than me sing his heart out.

To say I was hooked would be an understatement. I began to search for this elusive boy wonder. Of course, by 1979, he was a grown man. My first true album experience with him was Off the Wall. When my mom went to the hospital to have my brother, I stayed with my uncle and his family. My cousin had just copped the new MJ album, and it was awesome. We put it on while we played and sang and had a good time.

By the time Thriller came out, I was 13-years-old and more than ready to embrace all that Michael had to offer. My stepfather brought the album home, and I wore it out. It was so bad that the liner notes -- complete with the lyrics -- was falling apart in a matter of months. I loved all thing Michael at that point. While I wasn't fortunate enough to have the red jacket, I did have a glove and some glitter socks. (Besides, I really wanted the white jacket worn by the rival gang leader in the Beat It video.)

Of course, like everything in childhood, my love for Michael waned -- especially when New Edition came out. It wasn't that I didn't love him anymore, but with him being so much older than me, I realized that a romance was impossible. Don't get me wrong -- I still loved his music. Remember the Time came out when I'm in college, and I still love that song.

Over the years, Michael's interesting way of life tainted the squeaky-clean image he had when I was a kid. Even still, I loved him. As for the molestation situation, I'll say this. I don't know what he did, but I blame the parents who let their children stay with him more than I blame him. How stupid are you to let your baby boy stay with a grown stranger?

Fast forward to June 25th. I was coming home from breakfast with my boyfriend when I got an email saying that Michael Jackson had suffered a heart attack. After that, I turned on the television and my computer to see if it was true. Naturally, it was devastating to me when it was confirmed. And I'm still devastated.

I think my friend, Tikia, said it best when she said that MJ's death signifies the end of our childhood. R.I.P to both my innocence and Michael Jackson.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

He's Gone...For Real

My uncle died. He actually ceased to live. I don't know how to handle this. Even though he was my mother's brother, he was so much more than that to me. He was the coolest cat on the block, He set the standard that every man had to meet. He was the one I compared every man in my life to. For all intents and purposes, he was my de facto dad. I am stunned. I feel like someone knocked the wind out of my body. I grew up watching him. If he sat up straight, I wanted to sit up straight. I once caught him standing up to pee. I thought I'd do that when I grew up, too. (You can just imagine that conversation). That's the thing...he never shied away from my craziness. When I discovered what a father was -- at the tender age of five -- I purposed in my heart to find one for myself. I asked every man I knew, including him, if they'd be my daddy. He said, "I can't be your dad. I'm your uncle." When I pressed, he gently explained that he already had a significan...
Post a Comment
Read more

A Middle Aged Rant

I am single. I’ve never had a husband. I’ve never given birth to a child. I’ve never lived with a man over six months. I am 54. I’m not classically pretty. I’m overweight. I’m not very tall. My brother says I’m a unicorn. My friends are kind enough not to make me feel small. My mother mentions in passing that she wants me to find a husband. I try not to be sad about my state. I’ve lived a life that some would find enviable. I had my dream job, met and interviewed great people, made great friends, and traveled all over the world. I have a new career that I find oddly fulfilling. Men don’t always like that. Some of them are jealous because I’m not easily impressed. Some are jealous because I’ve done things they haven’t. Some are jealous because I’ve lived on both coasts. I don’t know what to do. I can’t change my life – not that I want to. I can’t change my past – not that I want to. I can’t change myself –not that I want to. I just want someone to see me, not the image I present. I want...
Post a Comment
Read more

I Own My Tears

I own my tears. I used this as a hashtag on a Facebook post. I was talking about the movie, "The Fault in Our Stars." If you've seen it, you know what I mean, and I won't spoil it for you. Of course, you know me -- it's deeper than that. I need to say it out loud... I own my tears. New Boo meant the world to me. He really did. Our relationship meant the world to me. It really, really did. And now it's over and he's gone -- seemingly for good. That makes me cry more than I want to, and more than I have ever imagined I would. And while I hate it, I need to do this. I need to mourn this thing in its entirety because it has truly changed my life. I own my tears. I own the fact that I am hurt. I own the fact that I'm mourning a relationship that I wanted to work more than life itself. I wanted to be a part of a couple, and eventually a family. That may well happen for me one day. Today, though, it doesn't look likely. So yes, I cry. And you ...
1 comment
Read more