Skip to main content

An Update

I decided to block New Boo on both my phone and Facebook.

It was not an easy decision. I didn't really want to cut him out of my life that way, but I realized that he'd already done it to me. And when you do that, you don't get the luxury of dropping in when YOU want to.

Besides, what do we have to talk about? He claims he wants to be my friend, but he's not honest enough to tell the truth about anything. And I'm tired of waiting for him to "get it together."

If a person loves you and wants to be with you, he or she will. It's just that simple. New Boo has made it clear that he doesn't want to be with me. I'm okay with that. Now I've got to heal from that, and I can't do it if there's always a possibility of him dropping in on me and destroying whatever stability I've found.

When I asked him why he'd dropped me as a friend on Facebook, he told me that he dropped everyone -- as if that would make it better. Like it was okay to lump me in with everyone else. In that moment, I realized that I was no longer special to him. So if I'm not special to him, why am I holding a special place in my life for him? It's just not necessary.

We're moving into a new season, and I'm moving away from New Boo. Period.

**********

In other news, Tinderfella wants to hook up again. I do not. I like him as a friend, but the sex leaves a LOT to be desired. Therefore, I want no parts of it.

But how do you say that to a man? How do you say, "I'd rather gargle with Clorox and lime than get naked with you again?" Trust me, I completely mean that.

Honestly, I don't remember when I've had sex quite that bad. Of course, in his defense, it could've been those first time jitters. Most people don't perform well the first time. I remember a guy from back in the day who couldn't keep it up at all. But his headgame was so on-point that I gave him another chance. He came back with something to prove -- and let's just say he succeeded.

Maybe that could be Tinderfella's story. I don't know. How 'bout I just don't want to find out?

Here's why. If he gets sprung on me, he's going to want to do it again and again and again. I don't know if I want that kind of relationship right now.

Another thing I'm noticing is that he's cheap. He wants to come over here later this week to -- in his words -- "make me tremble." But does he want to go out to dinner? Does he want to go to the movies? No. He wants me to meet him at his school and bring him home. Uh...yeah...that's not going to happen. At least not in this here lifetime.

So I'm at an impasse with Tinderfella. But I think my period is coming soon...and I'm going to play that thing to the hilt. Just watch.

For real though, I've got to figure a way out of this -- both literally and figuratively.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

I Own My Tears

I own my tears. I used this as a hashtag on a Facebook post. I was talking about the movie, "The Fault in Our Stars." If you've seen it, you know what I mean, and I won't spoil it for you. Of course, you know me -- it's deeper than that. I need to say it out loud... I own my tears. New Boo meant the world to me. He really did. Our relationship meant the world to me. It really, really did. And now it's over and he's gone -- seemingly for good. That makes me cry more than I want to, and more than I have ever imagined I would. And while I hate it, I need to do this. I need to mourn this thing in its entirety because it has truly changed my life. I own my tears. I own the fact that I am hurt. I own the fact that I'm mourning a relationship that I wanted to work more than life itself. I wanted to be a part of a couple, and eventually a family. That may well happen for me one day. Today, though, it doesn't look likely. So yes, I cry. And you ...

The Five Commandments of Houseguests

It's Sunday night, and I just put one of my girlfriends on the plane. She's a great person, but this weekend wore on me like none other. In her defense, she's in mourning. Her husband just died in September, and she's learning how to live again. They had been together since high school and now he's gone. That being said...there was NO excuse for the way she acted this weekend. Please understand...I'm not perfect. Never have been. And now that I'm 40, I don't feel the need to apologize for it. But NO ONE gets to make me feel inferior in MY house. Absolutely not! My house wasn't exactly in tip-top shape. I work two jobs, sing in the church choir, and try to work out with my trainer twice a week. So my house wasn't really ready for her. Then I realized that my mind wasn't ready for her, either. Even when we were in school, she wasn't the friend I could hang out with every day. More than that, she came with the very mentality th...

A New Possibility?

If you've been reading EFTDOAD for any length of time, you've probably noticed that I haven't really talked about a man. By that, I mean a man of my own. What's really sad is that there hasn't been a man in my life for the entire time I've been writing this blog. I hate that. However, things may be looking up for me. One of my good friends hosts a forum in Los Angeles called " Battle of the Sexes ." This monthly event consists of guys and girls submitting questions anonymously to the moderators, with the answers being discussed in an open forum. It can get quite rowdy, and the discussions are always enlightening. For most of us, it's the first time we've really heard what members of the opposite sex think. I've been attending these Battles for a few months now. Even though I'm not a fan of mindless rhetoric, it's cool to be around some single people who can think and put together coherent sentences. The last couple of times I'v...