Excerpts from the Diary of a Diva

Whodini probably said it best when they asked the question, "Friends...how many of us have them? Ones we can depend on?" If you came of age in the 80s, you can fill in the rest. Anyway, I have to say that I have some of the best friends in the world. Since my brother and I are 10 years apart, I look at the ladies in my life as being my sisters, and they all more than fit the bill. However, for today's purposes, I want to recognize two of them -- Angela and Janelle. Angela and I met at the University of North Texas in 1994. We sang in the gospel choir together, and to be honest, I didn't really think we'd be friends. See, Angela is totally blind. While I've never been one to discriminate, I just didn't think that we'd ever hang out. All that changed in the summer of '94. She was hanging out with another friend of mine, and we got a chance to talk. This woman was smart, funny, and extremely cool. More importantly, she gave me a perspective on life I...

Is dating a lost art form? What happened to the days when a man saw a woman he liked, asked her out, and they went out for drinks, maybe dinner, and stimulating conversation? Have we become so infatuated with the pursuit of sex that we forget that we're connecting to another person's soul? Is disrespect in such heavy rotation that we forget about treating others how we want to be treated? Case in point. I'm at the gym. I've already taken spin class -- which I despise -- and I'm getting ready to take boot camp. There's a slight break between them, so I'm heading downstairs to get a bottle of water. I'm standing by the elevator when one of the spin warriors says to me, "I know you're not about to take that elevator." I turn around and give him that, "Are you kidding me" look that I'm famous for before answering, "Uh, yeah." He proceeds to chastise me so much that I end up taking the stairs with him. This man tells me t...

The word for the day is focus. I've got to learn how to focus my thoughts so I can write a successful blog. What makes a blog successful, you ask? In my opinion, there's a point to it. It has a specific purpose, i.e. entertainment, political opinion, weight loss, etc. Right now, I'm just jotting down random thoughts as they come. While it may be therapeutic and downright fun for me, you probably aren't as entertained by my musings as I am. Therefore, I'm going to continue to post what's on my mind, but I'll make it a point to try and get it together soon. Deal? Now for today's thought... It's Sunday, and I went to church. While that probably sounds pretty mundate and regular, I'm so glad to be able to go. See, when I was living the night life, it was hard for me to go because I worked from Sunday to Thursday. That meant I had to get as much rest as possible before going to work. Unlike some jobs which allow for sleeping, i.e. security guard (I...

I'm so tired of Black people accusing other Black people of not being Black enough. First of all, who gets to decides what Black is? I thought that being born with melanin-rich skin did the trick, but I found out early that it's only part of the equation. When I was a kid in the 1980s, people in my small East Texas town swore that I, quote, "thought I was white," because I used proper English when I spoke. Never mind that I've never been mistaken for being mixed or even light-skinned. Because my subjects and verbs always agreed, I was relegated to that "not Black enough" purgatory reserved for those of us who know how to use the language. Fast forward to the new millennium, and things really haven't changed much. Thanks to BET, if we're not living in the ghetto with at least one relative in street pharmaceuticals, we still have to struggle to prove how Black we are. I'm tired of it. No matter how educated I am, when I look in my mirror, I st...

The process of blogging is so interesting to me. Now that I have one, I find myself thinking of so many things I want to share. In fact, I've noticed that my thoughts are more focused than they were before. If I have a thought, I try to flesh it out in my mind to be a post. That's amazing for me, the reluctant writer and blogger. See, my mom and quite a few of my teachers and friends have told me that I need to write. They've always said that I have a way with words. Actually, I love to talk. That's why I love radio so much. I get paid to do what I've done continuously since I can remember. I'll admit that I've got a pretty good vocabulary and I can, as a former co-worker put it, "turn a phrase." However, the actual process of researching, writing, proofing, and rewriting is so very tedious to me that it turns me off. I guess I'm just lazy that way. Having said that, though, I did write. For seven long, tedious years, I was an entertainment new...

I was born in Los Angeles, raised in a small Texas town, and grew up in New York. I guess you could say I'm an honorary New Yorker with Southern sensibilities. Now I live in LA again. When I was a kid, I used to imagine how much better off I would be if I were growing up somewhere -- anywhere -- else. LA was usually at the top of my list. Now that I'm here, I see why my mom got us out of here. LA is one of the most beautiful contradictions I've ever encountered. It's looks great here. There's sun, sand, beautiful beaches, and the best weather in the country. (Of course, Tony! Toni! Tony! lied when they said that it never rains in Southern California. In fact, it's raining today. But I digress.) Everything you've ever seen on TV about this place is true. The contradiction comes in when you look at the people and the way they live. There's a "California Girl" asthetic of being slim and long-haired that everyone feeds into. Since a size 10 is cons...

You don't know me yet, but I'm hoping in time you will. For the record, I'm not really a fan of blogging. I personally don't think you need to know what goes on in my mind unless you're a part of my inner circle. However, as a person who has an insane need to express myself, I thought this might be a good way to let off some steam. Now, a few things about me... I'm a woman who loves Jesus, popcorn, music, life, and people -- not necessarily in that order. I am wonderful. In fact, I'm so wonderful that you can be wonderful, too, and that won't negate any of my wonderfulness. Fortunately for you, there's room in this world for a whole lot of wonderful people. Even though that last statement might make me sound conceited, I'm really not. In fact, I'm just learning how to love myself in spite of my imperfections. While I'm not a political person by nature, I'm angry at the way our government has handled us. It bothers me that young men ar...