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Showing posts from June, 2017

Still Here

And the situation continues...

I still have not mustered up the guts to end things with My Teddy Bear. It's hard to break up with someone you barely talk to. Our conversations are so superficial. We never talk about substantive stuff, and now I see how that's affected me.

When we first started dating, I wanted to share things with him, but he only wanted to hear about things pertaining to me. I didn't matter if it was important to me -- he wanted no parts of it. It doesn't work that way for me. Instead of fighting for what I wanted -- the freedom to discuss everything with him -- I retreated. I just started talking to other people.

At the beginning, we'd have sex on a somewhat regular basis. However, it was also around the time I started getting sick, so I was out of commission a lot of time. After he decided that he didn't want to sleep with me -- because of his low T, I found out later -- I still didn't fight it. When he said he didn't want to discuss…

Holding it Together is Hard...

So...I told you the end is near for My Teddy Bear and I.

Because I'm not a total bitch -- or maybe I should say because I don't want to be -- I'm putting it off by a week or so because he lost one of his best friends.

But it's getting harder and harder to hold this sham together.

Case in point -- my homegirl's birthday party. I was drunker than I needed to be on a work night, and I showed out. I was dancing with all kinds of boys -- mostly gay, but one is bi and wants me badly. With his well-toned physique and winning personality, I like him, too. Even though I know I won't go there, you couldn't tell it the way I was grinding up on him. Much to my chagrin, I let my affection-starved body take over.

Let's just say that it was NOT a good look -- especially since his friends were there.

He ended up coming home with us...and he didn't say a word about what went on. He also didn't make a move on me. At all. Ugh...

In other party news, I spoke to New…