Skip to main content

Oh Boy...

Okay...can I just say that I'm not cut out for war? Even though I'm the wronged party, I'm the one suffering. My stomach is in knots, my head hurts, and I can't rest. (Anyone who knows me well KNOWS I'm having a hard time if sleep isn't peaceful.) I can barely get my work done, and the dreams...they're driving me up the wall.

Last night's episode found me living with some old man in the back of some church-like building. My pastor stopped by help us do something -- again, I can't tell you what. Anyway, he saw me coming from the man's living quarters into the sanctuary. Naturally, I was embarrassed, but when the pastor called me over to talk to him, I woke up.

All of this just confirms what I've known for a while now....I need to get out of his house as soon as I possibly can. Even though I hadn't planned to make a move for a few months, it looks like the time has come.

And just so you know...he hasn't apologized. I'm guessing he feels completely justified in his actions, so he's been acting like everything is hunky-dory.

This is almost as much drama as a Grey's Anatomy episode. Stay tuned...

Comments

Redbonegirl97 said…
Wow, so sorry, hope you get through it.

Tiffany
http://liferequiresmorechocolate.blogspot.com

Popular posts from this blog

Out of Time

Time. You always think you have more...until you don't. I'm there.

I just left the doctor, where we discussed my fibroid. She said it was huge. So huge, in fact, that she couldn't get it all. If there's a need for another surgery, it'll be a hysterectomy.

I want babies. I want to be someone's mother. I also want to be someone's wife before I become someone's mother. And therein lies my dilemma.

It would be stupid for me to have a baby with My Teddy Bear. That's the reality of my life right now. But it would be even stupider to have a child with New Boo. Not only does he not want any more babies, he does't take care of the ones he already has. I would be an absolute idiot to attempt procreation with him. And as quiet as it's kept, I'm not interested in raising a child alone. I want my baby to have a mother AND a father.

So here I am, a 46-year-old woman who's run out of time.

My Personal Superhero

My Teddy Bear continues to prove that he loves me in ways I never thought about.

As I told you before, I've been dealing with health issues. It's not pretty at all. I won't go into details, but let's just say that it's messy and leaves me weak sometimes. Weaker than I'd ever want to admit, actually.

Anyway, a friend of mine was coming to visit and I was trying to get my house ready. I managed to clean my bedroom and the bathroom before MTB came over. All I had to do was get the living room and kitchen together. But my body wasn't cooperating at all. I was in so much pain that I laid it down.

I woke up the next morning in a complete mess from my issue. After I got up to clean myself up, he says to me, "Go lay down. I'm gonna finish up for you." I wanted to argue, but I couldn't because I was in too much pain.

That man cleaned my apartment. All of it. Swept AND mopped my floors and did all my dishes. And did it with a smile.

Just thinking ab…

Update

So...I finally unburdened myself to New Boo. I told him that I wasn't built for sneaking around and random treks down the primrose path to sin & degradation.

As expected, he told me, "I thought you wanted just to chill." Then he added -- almost as a smackdown, in my opinion -- "I'm not looking for any relationship. And you're the one who involved me."

He's right. I did. And now I can finally UN-involve him.

I'm not angry. I have no right to be. But I AM finally able to get a bit of closure. And maybe NOW I can move on.

Now the question of my life is...will I be moving on with My Teddy Bear, or on my own?

PS: I think the onset of my period caused me to be in my feelings.