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It's Over...

So I did it. I broke up with The One. And now I'm sad.

I'm not sad because we broke up. That had to happen. He didn't respect the relationship or me anymore, so it was time for him to go. But that doesn't mean that I'm not mourning the death of our relationship. It doesn't mean that I don't love him. It doesn't mean that I'm not worried about him. It just means that I can't be attached to him as he spirals out of control to self-destruction.

I wish I could rewind the last three months...back to when we were good. When he loved me and wanted our relationship to work. I wish I could take all the love I have for him and infuse into his pores so that he would do what needed to be done for us to be together.

That's the real issue. My love wasn't enough to make him want to do and be better for us. At the end of the day, that's what I wish I could change. That's what hurts me to my core.

I know that when the story of our love is retold by him, I'll be that bitch. I already know that. And honestly, it hurts because that's not who I am or what this was. This was a love affair that was murdered by indifference and abandonment.

I know I'll get over this. I always do. But I'm not gonna lie...it's gonna be hard.

Comments

JB said…
I was really rooting for you. You deserve that special thing. Keep on working, playing, and writing.
August 5, 2014 at 10:22:00 AM EDT
MackDiva said…
Thank you for that, JB. I had really wanted it to work, too. In the end, it just wasn't meant to be. And while I'm hurting now, I realize that it's completely for the best. :-) Hope all is well with you, and thanks for reading my humble musings.
August 5, 2014 at 10:54:00 AM EDT
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