Skip to main content

Been So Long…

It’s been a while since I’ve visited this space to share. What can I say? Life has been life-ing.

I moved back to Texas. I can honestly say that it wasn’t my intention, but it was necessary because I wouldn’t have any peace in New York with my mom’s health in jeopardy.

I finally put New Boo in the rear view. He comes up in my thoughts on occasion, but not like before. I still have love for him…probably always will…but I can function without wondering about him every moment of the day. 

Now it’s all about Tinderfella. If you recall, I met him during the initial breakup. While I recognized him as someone special, I was in no way equipped to be with him. I was too broken. Eight years later, I’m so glad we waited. While I’m probably still crazy on some level, I think we have a real shot.

First let me give some context… 

I was in the middle of doing my show when he hit me up on my fan page. It was strange for two reasons — one, most of my friends just hit me on my regular page, and two, I literally hadn’t heard from him in eight years. We caught up with everything and then he dropped a bombshell that had me twisted.

When New Boo and I broke up, I was a wreck. I was crying every day. Literally. I met Tinderfella in an attempt to move on. Although he was super sweet, I wasn’t in any way ready to receive him and what he offered. I was so jacked up that I found myself in beginning stalker mode. That’s why the opportunity to go to California was so needed. I needed to get out of the city.

Tinderfella had no clue about what was going on with me. That’s why the news of me leaving was so devastating. He told me that he’d planned to ask me to be exclusive that same day.

I was shocked, to say the least. I’m actually glad we didn’t because we probably would’ve hated each other. As it stands, we’re making plans together.

I’m at a loss because I’ve never been here before.

He actually wants the same things I want, and he wants them with me. We talk every day and I feel strange if we go too long without contact. I want to share all my deep, dark secrets with him and he shares his with me. Reciprocity seems to be the name of the game, and I love it.

So why am I terrified?

Most relationships are good until they’re not. This one is so good right now. He makes me want to believe in forever. I see myself standing in front of my friends and family declaring love and devotion to his man…and he doesn’t seem to be opposed to it. He welcomes it. He talks about us like we have a future.

The last time I felt anything close to this was with New Boo. But while he was just saying what I wanted to hear, that doesn’t seem to be the case with Tinderfella. He seems sincere in all the right ways. Of course, until I look in his eyes and see what I want to see, it won’t be completely real.

I do hope it is because I need this in my life right now.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A New Possibility?

If you've been reading EFTDOAD for any length of time, you've probably noticed that I haven't really talked about a man. By that, I mean a man of my own. What's really sad is that there hasn't been a man in my life for the entire time I've been writing this blog. I hate that. However, things may be looking up for me. One of my good friends hosts a forum in Los Angeles called " Battle of the Sexes ." This monthly event consists of guys and girls submitting questions anonymously to the moderators, with the answers being discussed in an open forum. It can get quite rowdy, and the discussions are always enlightening. For most of us, it's the first time we've really heard what members of the opposite sex think. I've been attending these Battles for a few months now. Even though I'm not a fan of mindless rhetoric, it's cool to be around some single people who can think and put together coherent sentences. The last couple of times I'v...

Life Matters: My Take on All This Madness

I am vexed beyond words about the situation with the two police officers being shot in Brooklyn. What bothers me is the blatant disregard for life -- on both sides. The man who felt like it was okay to take the lives of two police officers CLEARLY had no disregard for life because he took theirs and his own. And then there are the situations with Eric Garner and Michael Brown. Both situations show a disregard for life. For humanity, really. And it's painful to me that all of these families will have holes in them because someone felt like it was okay to take a life. There was a time in the not-so-distant past when people could fight and disagree -- and everyone went home to fight another day. When did it become okay to kill a person for whatever reason? As quiet as it's kept, by NOT indicting the police officers for killing those guys, it shows that life doesn't really matter. And it's easy to say Black life (and believe me, I do believe that it's open season ...

The Baby...

I heard from The Baby today. The Baby is a young man I met at work. Nice enough guy...he's 29...new to the radio game...and tall and lanky like I like 'em. He showed up at our studios because he was caught in the throes of his format's contract negotiations. When I saw him, I was kinda speechless. Not because he was cute -- he was -- but because I NEVER see other chocolate faces at my job. The conversation we had was one part interesting, one part amusing, but completely charming. Even though my interest in him was purely professional, we exchanged numbers. See, in addition to working as a radio engineer, he also has the inside track to this weekly show I like. For me, that was it. We exchanged a few texts, but nothing major. Then, one day he said that we should hang out. Since I'm always down for an adventure, I accepted. We ended up spending the day at the beach. We had a good time, but there were some definite red flags for me... For one, he didn't tip ...