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Addressing Random Thoughts and End-of-Year Things...

First off, I want to update you on the latest news in the life...

1. Mr. Wonderful and I went to Texas for Thanksgiving. I would love to say that everything was great, but that would be an erroneous statement. My family didn't like him, and they were looking at me like I was an idiot to be with him. Since I'm not used to seeing him in any environment that he's not the star of, and it was interesting. I've never seen a man his age work to impress people.

2. I cut my hair. Actually, my brother did the honors the night before my birthday. When he finished, I was left with what is commonly referred to as a teeny weeny afro. To say I was devastated would be an understatement. Even though I allowed it, I was not ready to see myself without hair. It took me a solid week before I let any of my friends see my new 'do. Honestly, I'm still getting used to it.

3. I'm still underemployed, and I'm still trying to figure out what I'm good at. This new year will be about realizing my full potential, no matter what it is.

Now, for my end of the year stuff...

I want this year to be the best year ever, period. When my 40th birthday rolls around, I want to be in a much better position than I was this time.

As for my love life, I don't know what to make of it. Yes, Mr. Wonderful and I are still together, but I don't know how much longer it can last. This living together situation isn't something I plan to do much longer, and I don't know how our relationship will hold up when I move. After everything we've been through, I think I just want to be free.


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Anyway, a friend of mine was coming to visit and I was trying to get my house ready. I managed to clean my bedroom and the bathroom before MTB came over. All I had to do was get the living room and kitchen together. But my body wasn't cooperating at all. I was in so much pain that I laid it down.

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Just thinking ab…


So...I finally unburdened myself to New Boo. I told him that I wasn't built for sneaking around and random treks down the primrose path to sin & degradation.

As expected, he told me, "I thought you wanted just to chill." Then he added -- almost as a smackdown, in my opinion -- "I'm not looking for any relationship. And you're the one who involved me."

He's right. I did. And now I can finally UN-involve him.

I'm not angry. I have no right to be. But I AM finally able to get a bit of closure. And maybe NOW I can move on.

Now the question of my life is...will I be moving on with My Teddy Bear, or on my own?

PS: I think the onset of my period caused me to be in my feelings.