Skip to main content

C.R.E.A.M.

How many tears does it take to wash away the pain? Even though I've always been known to cry at the drop of a hat -- I'm the punk who can watch Grey's Anatomy and be jacked up -- this is different. This brand of hurt comes up when I least expect it, and it drains me. I thought I used up a lot of tears yesterday, crying off and on, but it seems that there are even more things to cry about than Granny's death.

We found out that my grandmother's beloved church won't allow us to have funeral services there unless we come up with a fee. Never mind that she loved that church, raised her children in it, served in the mission ministry, etc. In this new era of "church business," we've been told that none of her history matters. Because this 96-year-old woman wasn't an "active" member, (seriously, how active can you be when you're as old as dirt?) they've got to get paid. While the fee itself isn't astronimical, the principle of it is, and it hurts.

I understand that people need to get paid for their services -- Lord knows I do -- but I think that at a time like this, there should be some exceptions. No matter how ready a family is for a death, they can't possibly be prepared for everything. Everyone expects to be nickel-and-dimed by the funeral home, but the church? A friend of mine who's experienced way more tragedy than I have told me that it's standard practice for churches to charge because it takes money to do things these days. No one wants to give up their Saturday for someone else -- even if it IS in their time of deepest need.

If this incident is any indication of what's to come, I know I'll be shedding even more tears. Stay tuned...

Comments

Janelle said…
This is your pain talking and it's okay. Yes, it is common practice for the Church to request a fee. Some churches require the fee whether you are an active member or not. You could have put money in the collection plate on Sunday and you're family would still have to pay a funeral fee. Try not to think of it as the church trying to get paid. Think of it as paying for the send off that Granny deserves.

Love ya, darling!!!

Popular posts from this blog

A New Possibility?

If you've been reading EFTDOAD for any length of time, you've probably noticed that I haven't really talked about a man. By that, I mean a man of my own. What's really sad is that there hasn't been a man in my life for the entire time I've been writing this blog. I hate that. However, things may be looking up for me. One of my good friends hosts a forum in Los Angeles called " Battle of the Sexes ." This monthly event consists of guys and girls submitting questions anonymously to the moderators, with the answers being discussed in an open forum. It can get quite rowdy, and the discussions are always enlightening. For most of us, it's the first time we've really heard what members of the opposite sex think. I've been attending these Battles for a few months now. Even though I'm not a fan of mindless rhetoric, it's cool to be around some single people who can think and put together coherent sentences. The last couple of times I'v...

Life Matters: My Take on All This Madness

I am vexed beyond words about the situation with the two police officers being shot in Brooklyn. What bothers me is the blatant disregard for life -- on both sides. The man who felt like it was okay to take the lives of two police officers CLEARLY had no disregard for life because he took theirs and his own. And then there are the situations with Eric Garner and Michael Brown. Both situations show a disregard for life. For humanity, really. And it's painful to me that all of these families will have holes in them because someone felt like it was okay to take a life. There was a time in the not-so-distant past when people could fight and disagree -- and everyone went home to fight another day. When did it become okay to kill a person for whatever reason? As quiet as it's kept, by NOT indicting the police officers for killing those guys, it shows that life doesn't really matter. And it's easy to say Black life (and believe me, I do believe that it's open season ...

The Baby...

I heard from The Baby today. The Baby is a young man I met at work. Nice enough guy...he's 29...new to the radio game...and tall and lanky like I like 'em. He showed up at our studios because he was caught in the throes of his format's contract negotiations. When I saw him, I was kinda speechless. Not because he was cute -- he was -- but because I NEVER see other chocolate faces at my job. The conversation we had was one part interesting, one part amusing, but completely charming. Even though my interest in him was purely professional, we exchanged numbers. See, in addition to working as a radio engineer, he also has the inside track to this weekly show I like. For me, that was it. We exchanged a few texts, but nothing major. Then, one day he said that we should hang out. Since I'm always down for an adventure, I accepted. We ended up spending the day at the beach. We had a good time, but there were some definite red flags for me... For one, he didn't tip ...