Skip to main content

I Miss You...

It's been five years since you left us, and I still can't get over it. I almost forgot that you weren't here, but when I wanted to check on you, I realized it all over again. Today is your birthday. You would've been 46.

I still think of you. I want to get your opinion on all the things going on in my life. I want to update you on the latest moron who tried to get his mack on...or hear how things are going with you. Who  you've had to put in his or her place. What goofy thing you're tripping off this time.

I want to know what you think of this election. I'd love to hear your impression of Hillary or Donald...how they make you feel. Maybe you'd vote for a third party candidate. Or maybe you wouldn't vote at all and we'd fuss. I'd do my best to make my case for why it would be necessary for you to vote, and you'd blow me off with something like, It won't count anyway.

Wait...I know you wouldn't do that...but I digress...

The point is I miss you. I miss our time together. I miss the possibility of laughing, crying, and getting old with you somewhere in the world. I miss you living, chick.

Happy Birthday, my friend. I miss you.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

On Barack, the Nomination, and Black Love

I'm so excited about Barack Obama! I know I'm just joining the teeming millions when I say that, but I think something this big is worth repeating. Never before in the history of our country has a Black man been in a position to lead the free world, and it feels good. I'm so glad that I've lived long enough to see this day.

Beside the fact that Barack is a great candidate for the Democratic party, I'm moved by his relationship with Michelle. Not since The Cosby Show have we seen a successful Black couple who have a genuine and sincere love and respect for one another. What makes their relationship so special is that it's real -- not the product of someone's imagination.

I obviously don't know Michelle Obama, but I want to grow up to be just like her. I love the fact that she doesn't NEED Barack. She's strong, smart, and successful in her own right, yet secure enough to fall back and be supportive of her man. That's something that all y…

Out of Time

Time. You always think you have more...until you don't. I'm there.

I just left the doctor, where we discussed my fibroid. She said it was huge. So huge, in fact, that she couldn't get it all. If there's a need for another surgery, it'll be a hysterectomy.

I want babies. I want to be someone's mother. I also want to be someone's wife before I become someone's mother. And therein lies my dilemma.

It would be stupid for me to have a baby with My Teddy Bear. That's the reality of my life right now. But it would be even stupider to have a child with New Boo. Not only does he not want any more babies, he does't take care of the ones he already has. I would be an absolute idiot to attempt procreation with him. And as quiet as it's kept, I'm not interested in raising a child alone. I want my baby to have a mother AND a father.

So here I am, a 46-year-old woman who's run out of time.

Update

So...I finally unburdened myself to New Boo. I told him that I wasn't built for sneaking around and random treks down the primrose path to sin & degradation.

As expected, he told me, "I thought you wanted just to chill." Then he added -- almost as a smackdown, in my opinion -- "I'm not looking for any relationship. And you're the one who involved me."

He's right. I did. And now I can finally UN-involve him.

I'm not angry. I have no right to be. But I AM finally able to get a bit of closure. And maybe NOW I can move on.

Now the question of my life is...will I be moving on with My Teddy Bear, or on my own?

PS: I think the onset of my period caused me to be in my feelings.