Skip to main content

Making Moves...

It's interesting to me how this thing is working.

I decided on Wednesday not to contact New Boo. So what did I wake up to yesterday? A hello text.

I have to admit that it made me feel good to know that he was kinda concerned about me.

We chatted for a minute, and then -- as usual -- he let the conversation drop at a critical point.

Normally I would've pressed him. This time, I didn't. I can't say I didn't care, but I can say that it wasn't as stinging as it has been.

I guess I'm moving on...

I decided that it's imperative that I get this house in order. I want to redecorate. Make it look like a single woman lives here. I'm gonna get slipcovers for the couch and the ottoman, and I'm going to do something with the walls.

If you've followed me for any length of time, you KNOW that decorating isn't my strong suit. It's actually something I've never been able to do. But this time, it's important. I have to let people know that this apartment is mine -- not mine and New Boo's. I have to let HIM know that the won't be able to come back here and get cozy again -- not without making some major changes in his lifestyle.

Basically, this is my declaration...


A new day has dawned in my home. While I don't know when I'll be ready to embrace that concept to its fullest, I'm determined to make moves in that direction.

Comments

JB said…
I wish there were a like button on your post. I would click it. My hope for you is that you spend some time, like your friend told you, letting yourself feel the way you feel and nurturing yourself. When I want to nurture myself, I take long walks with my dog, I sit a the computer and hug my cat, and I try to make my little spaces feel like a sanctuary. You take good care.
June 26, 2015 at 5:58:00 PM EDT
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

He's Gone...For Real

My uncle died. He actually ceased to live. I don't know how to handle this. Even though he was my mother's brother, he was so much more than that to me. He was the coolest cat on the block, He set the standard that every man had to meet. He was the one I compared every man in my life to. For all intents and purposes, he was my de facto dad. I am stunned. I feel like someone knocked the wind out of my body. I grew up watching him. If he sat up straight, I wanted to sit up straight. I once caught him standing up to pee. I thought I'd do that when I grew up, too. (You can just imagine that conversation). That's the thing...he never shied away from my craziness. When I discovered what a father was -- at the tender age of five -- I purposed in my heart to find one for myself. I asked every man I knew, including him, if they'd be my daddy. He said, "I can't be your dad. I'm your uncle." When I pressed, he gently explained that he already had a significan...
Post a Comment
Read more

The Five Commandments of Houseguests

It's Sunday night, and I just put one of my girlfriends on the plane. She's a great person, but this weekend wore on me like none other. In her defense, she's in mourning. Her husband just died in September, and she's learning how to live again. They had been together since high school and now he's gone. That being said...there was NO excuse for the way she acted this weekend. Please understand...I'm not perfect. Never have been. And now that I'm 40, I don't feel the need to apologize for it. But NO ONE gets to make me feel inferior in MY house. Absolutely not! My house wasn't exactly in tip-top shape. I work two jobs, sing in the church choir, and try to work out with my trainer twice a week. So my house wasn't really ready for her. Then I realized that my mind wasn't ready for her, either. Even when we were in school, she wasn't the friend I could hang out with every day. More than that, she came with the very mentality th...
5 comments
Read more

A Middle Aged Rant

I am single. I’ve never had a husband. I’ve never given birth to a child. I’ve never lived with a man over six months. I am 54. I’m not classically pretty. I’m overweight. I’m not very tall. My brother says I’m a unicorn. My friends are kind enough not to make me feel small. My mother mentions in passing that she wants me to find a husband. I try not to be sad about my state. I’ve lived a life that some would find enviable. I had my dream job, met and interviewed great people, made great friends, and traveled all over the world. I have a new career that I find oddly fulfilling. Men don’t always like that. Some of them are jealous because I’m not easily impressed. Some are jealous because I’ve done things they haven’t. Some are jealous because I’ve lived on both coasts. I don’t know what to do. I can’t change my life – not that I want to. I can’t change my past – not that I want to. I can’t change myself –not that I want to. I just want someone to see me, not the image I present. I want...
Post a Comment
Read more